It is a rainy day today, so Jack and I are stuck inside and I thought today should be the day to tell you about our little brother Drew. He is up in heaven with Great Grandma Arvilla.
Well Mom and Dad were so excited in July when they found out they were having their first baby. They had been talking about having a baby, Mom isn't a spring chicken anymore and getting to the age of higher risk pregnancies. Everything was going great. We were even getting company in the fall, Mom's oldest sister and her family, except the dogs, were coming to visit for the first time, so Mom was so excited.
Mom is always busy with school and sports in the fall. She coaches volleyball and basketball and they overlap, so she was working 14 plus hours a day sometimes. Mom went to the doctor on a routine visit and everything seemed to be fine, the babies heart beat was 160 beats per minute, and her belly was getting bigger. Estimation: 15 weeks along. Mom started having trouble the day after her appointment, but it didn't worry her too much. That Friday night, it started to get worse, and Mom and Dad started to get a little worried. They headed to the Hospital Sat. morning. Mom was having contractions, but there was nothing they could do at 15 weeks. Mom said that the emergency doctor was not very helpful, but one of the nurses told her to come back if it gets worse.
Saturday was the day, Mom was so excited, but couldn't do much, because the contractions came back early afternoon before my aunt and uncle arrived. Grandma and Grandpa had planned a meal for all of us that evening. While we all went to their house, Mom was getting worse. We went home early and Mom called the hospital. After talking with the on-call doctor, she decided she wanted to sleep in her own bed. 5 a.m. Sunday, October 12th, Mom woke up and they left for the hospital. I was so worried, because she hadn't come home. My Aunt and Uncle were there to take care of Jack and I which was nice, and I remember when Dad called my Aunt Leah. I could tell it wasn't good by the tone in her voice. Mom had lost our little brother Drew Van Frederick at 11:15 a.m. The doctor's said that Mom was 17 weeks by the size of him and she lost him because she has an incompetent cervix. That is where her cervix isn't strong enough to hold a baby full term. He was 6 inches long, and 3 ounces.
Mom came home on Monday, and I was so happy to see her, but she was really sad. So I made sure that I stayed by her and let her cry on my shoulders and just hug me all she needed. I did all I could to help her feel better. You know, the thing about all of this is that Drew helped Mom realize that she can carry a baby, and that now they know what to do to prevent anything like this from happening. Drew also did something special, he let Mom and Aunt Leah get to know each other better. They are 12 years apart in age, and Aunt Leah was married and out of the house before Mom could even remember a lot. Mom told me that Leah had baby-sat her quite a bit and did a lot for her, but she was so little that she doesn't remember a lot. Anyway, Mom was more than grateful that Aunt Leah was the one here to hold her hand and comfort her from the Nilson side of the family.
Mom had the week off now for rest and to help her get through this rough time. Aunt Leah, Uncle Steve and my cousin Amanda were here for the whole week. Mom got to go to a few places with them, to show them around Louisiana. They even saw a big alligator, but Drew was a great big thought in everyone's minds. Mom and Dad had a little service for my little brother, with just family and they were so grateful for all of the support.
Family was surrounding us that week, and that was the best medicine for my Mom and Dad. We are grateful for Drew, and Mom has said from the beginning that when Renee Arvilla Frederick arrives here, our new sister arrives and is old enough to understand, Mom will definitely let her know that because of Drew, she is here and is healthy and strong. Mom's cousin Christin sent her a quote; 'To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did.' When God takes something from your grasp, He's not punishing you, but merely opening your hands to receive something better. 'The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.'
That says it all right there. We love you Drew and will never forget you!!!!!
This is a picture of the little memorial we have in our house.
